i hurt for the women…

Try as I may to steer away from politics, it reached up and grabbed me by the throat this weekend.

It isn’t the political arena itself that disturbs me.  That can be a fabulous forum for learning about others, working for change, finding common ground and truly being a crusader to help those who can’t speak for themselves among many other purposes.  Politics enlighten us to others’ opinions and passions and when used for a higher good can be a liberating venture.

But when the media and political arenas are methodically and maliciously used to hurt, to inflict purposeful pain, to divide people from their place of connectedness with their fellow person/themselves/God, to destroy and mock for the sole purpose of making money or some vile sort of entertainment, that’s where I hop off the bus. 

This weekend I’ve chosen many courses of action related to the “war on women”.

It has been particularly challenging for me not to lose myself when this type of negativity presents itself.  Friday night was spent in a long distance phone conversation while my friend sobbed.  She, like myself and many others, felt that heaviness of pain thrust upon us by a man who succumbs regularly to the urge and addiction to hurt.  I watched another women attempt to be heard while comments and name calling  were flying around on Facebook and while I don’t know for sure, I think she was trying to alleviate her confusion in the spirit of communion. And I’ve raged in my own way.  Mostly I’ve reached out virtually to women I know in an attempt to “hold hands” with them as we sort through this together.  It is a time when I need my tribe the most; to help me find the beauty and purpose that grounds me.

I do hurt for the women; their families, their partners and children.  Wider than that, I hurt for their communities as the ripple of negativity plunges us under.  We hear the word “slut” and it becomes more than just a bit on TV, it becomes personal.  I think I actually felt a universal “wince” as those brutal words were played and replayed.

But true to the survivors that we are, we bob back to the surface, gasping for air, begin to clear our heads and process what has just happened.

And today, we are back.  Still holding hands with each other for support, we slowly start moving again.  We go to our gardens and look for the first sign of growth; some are reading to their children, others are silently praying for a more loving world while others are shouting it out.  Our bodies go back to our jobs but our hearts still hear the faint reverberations of hate.

We sit and hold this pain until its evident that it has passed through us instead of sticking in our hearts.  We again accept the challenge of how to love back in spite of the hurt.

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About Rescuing Little L

Documenting the pieces of my journey...recovery from childhood sexual abuse and cruel ignorance...the effects of those incidious acts through adulthood... until the grace of recovery transcended the trauma and shame of my past, making it possible to return to Rescue Little L.... View all posts by Rescuing Little L

18 responses to “i hurt for the women…

  • bipolarmuse

    Great post, and the picture you chose is magnificent. It is the true epitome of strength. ♥

    • Rescuing Little L

      Thanks Muse! I loved that little bird being so strong and just bowing her head and taking it….so sweet and strong, just like us…thank you again for being part of my tribe too! I get so geeked at having such wonderful women with me here!

  • Debbie Killian

    Little L,
    I know how you feel. Why is it women are always degraded??I know people may think we’ve come along way baby…but in reality we still are fighting to be cherished just as God intended us to be. We were not intended to be used and abused…but rather we are suppose to be CHERISHED! The word SLUT is such an awful word, but then I listen to our young women call thenselves bitches all the time, our young women have been desentsitized to the point where they see nothing wrong with slandering their own selves…how sad. It breaks my heart to see what this world has become. It bothers me more knowing that my grandchildren are going to have to live in this desentsitized world…GOD HELP US ALL!!!

    • Rescuing Little L

      Girl, you are right…we are to be cherished! And that language, omg, how it cuts through me….Now, on the subject of your grandchildren….they have you and they will be fine…providing them with a good loving environment and your daughters are strong, loving women…I would say you’ve done a great job and don’t need to worry….this cycle will continue to get watered down as it goes along and you are moving it into the light where it doesn’t stand a chance!

  • ssuzzk06

    Holding your hand, lifting your chin, looking in those eyes of determination and yelling to the world…..”This woman is my friend, she is a survivor and she will stand with her sisters and stare you down like an ugly bear!!!” Don’t mess with me and my sisters, ugliness….. cuz all you do is make us stronger and awnrier and you don’t want to go there. We will take you down and smother you with womanly pride until you cry like a baby. We have grown so much over the years and you obviously havent had to go toe to toe with us yet.
    Okay, I feel better now that I got to yell that out. Now we can hold hands with peace and calm and pride. Whewww. Thanks for letting me vent here L.

    • Rescuing Little L

      Anytime, my friend, venting here is absolutely okay with me….thanks for holding my hand and keeping the space…Joss was right, if we hold hands we will circle the world…Glad to have you here in the tribe…

  • ntexas99

    It can be incredibly difficult to keep politics out of the equation when dealing with women’s issues because it is all so interconnected. Women supporting each other has been what has kept us moving forward, injury after injury, year after year. It takes a certain tenacity to keep bobbing back to the surface, doesn’t it? This was a really insightful and encouraging blog post, and thanks for sharing it with us.

    • Rescuing Little L

      It does take tenacity and sometimes, like you, I wonder how long I will continue to pop up out of the water….we are a strong bunch and keep on truckin’….thanks, I didn’t feel that insightful but glad it came across that way, I was mostly sad and pissed…

  • ☼Illuminary☼

    We do what we can from where we are at.
    It is hard, and confusing
    and so very painful.
    And in the darkest parts of my night, I light a candle and whisper ..
    so that I might know that I am not alone.
    (((little L)))
    not alone

  • revrannulf

    Please, always come back to the surface!! Those of us of the male gland are not all horrible and we need you and your tribe to keep us truly human!

  • mtnpeace2

    Thank you for sharing this in such a beautiful way. You address the many strata of layers that surround this whole incident in such a compelling way. I loved when you said “sit and hold this pain until its evident that it has passed through us instead of sticking in our hearts. We again accept the challenge of how to love back in spite of the hurt.” I hurt for all women…my daughters, my granddaughters, my friends, my peers. It makes me sad.

    • Rescuing Little L

      Hi mtnpeace2…i feel us bobbing to the surface again, the sun is shining and there is hope…it does make us sad doesn’t it, but i still contend that our gentleness will help lead the way…

  • thelionthatroared

    Awesome. Holding hands indeed. Xx

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